I hate eating crow. Really. I do. It doesn’t taste good–it’s tough and stringy and I’m usually pretty hostile about it. So now… yeah. I get to face eating some crow and I’m not happy about it.

What in the hell am I babbling about? Well… Puppy wants to go to Folsom Fringe. He went last year and thought it was just awesome. Of course he wants me to go with him. The event is sponsered by http://www.smodyssey.com and I have not only avoided their events for years I have been pretty loud and vocal about avoiding their events and swearing up and down that I will never support Odyssey. *sigh* Some day I will learn to not use the word “never.” So uhm, now I feel like I am crawling back to Odyssey with my tail between my legs. I fully expect many people to give me shit for being there. I have been too much of a bitch for too many years for my presense to be overlooked. Although I could cop out and state that my reason for avoiding Odyssey is gone (which is largely true–Morgan isn’t involved anymore) and lots of people would understand boycotting that bitch. (She actually did extremely unpleasant things to me personally several times. It is a personal conflict not just disliking her in general.) Yeah. But this is going to be difficult.

But the funny thing is: I am actually looking forward to the conference. I only went to Thunder last year and I am not going to be at any other con’s this year and I am really missing the people I see at the big events. I actually did start making friends in the circuit of people who do the con’s and they are awesome people that I am unlikely to really see anywhere else given their geographic distribution. For at least a few more years I am unlikely to be able to afford many con’s so I guess that means sucking it up and doing the one that exists right in my area. *breathe*

In anticipation of this con I contacted one of the women I had a really nice interaction with at Thunder last year and asked if she would be coming with her Owner to Folsom (he’s presenting) and she is! Yay! She is very cool and we have now exchanged several emails and I am looking forward to the conference even more. Granted I am a wee bit nervous because I was silly enough to mention one of my big fears in an email (there was a reason to bring it up) and she said that she would really like to share that information with her Master. I about choked. He’s a very scary man. He is one of the few people that I would look around the scene and say, “He scares me,” while also knowing that I would love to play with him. Most of the people who scare me do so because they are unstable and I wouldn’t play with them. This man is completely in control and just that mean and that’s kinda hot. (He’s also really nice and very grounded. I don’t want to paint any sort of negative picture of him.)

So yeah. I’m looking forward to it and dreading it. Such is life I suppose. I get to see all sorts of cool people though!

Oh. Yeah. Something I forgot to mention. Part of why this is on my mind is the discussion group I went to. Puppy knows some of the people who were in attendance and when I told them that I am dating Phil they said, “Of Phil and Charis?” ouch. I’ve never before had a partner identified as part of a unit with someone else. That was kind of hard to swallow but I stayed nice about it. It is interesting how some people become known as part of a unit and some people are known as individuals. Tom and I were together for four years and I don’t think people really thought of us as a unit. We were both very firmly individuals who were known for ourselves. Puppy is pretty quiet and doesn’t seem to strike people as strongly. I’m not sure how I feel about that yet. Yeah. I’m feeling kind of intimidated about meeting her though. I’m trying to figure out why. They only dated for like three months, it wasn’t that serious of a relationship and he is the one who ended it. But I am petrified. I really do like to make things difficult for myself. She should be back in the country soon. oy.