Questions

A brat asked: What question, self examination or otherwise, would you least like to be asked about now?

And what question, self examination or otherwise, would you most like to be asked about now?

A long time ago, when I was a little girl, I remember my father taking me shooting. At the end of the day we were back at his house and he was cleaning the guns and I was sorta helping. He picked up one of the hand guns and held it to my head and asked me, “Do you deserve to live?”

I don’t want to be asked that right now.

I don’t actually know specifically what I want to be asked. This week has had some massively hard bumps and despite the fact that I am doing really well at my job right now I am very much feeling like a waste of oxygen. I would like for a question to exist that would lead me to believe I have some worth. But I don’t know that such a question exists.

38 thoughts on “Questions

  1. capnkjb

    What have you done in the last month/couple weeks that has benefited someone else (e.g., holding the door open for someone, giving a compliment, let someone ahead of you in line, etc)?

    Even if there are only one or two things that you can remember, it shows that you’ve made a positive impact on someone else’s life that would not have happened to them otherwise. I’d say that’s a reason to use oxygen.

    Reply
  2. capnkjb

    What have you done in the last month/couple weeks that has benefited someone else (e.g., holding the door open for someone, giving a compliment, let someone ahead of you in line, etc)?

    Even if there are only one or two things that you can remember, it shows that you’ve made a positive impact on someone else’s life that would not have happened to them otherwise. I’d say that’s a reason to use oxygen.

    Reply
  3. flotsomnjetsom

    Maybe a few

    How many of your past/current students have you helped inspire a love of learning in? How many of them have shown improvement while with you? How many times have your students given you gifts?

    You know high school students generally don’t give teachers gifts of appreciation unless they mean it.

    Reply
  4. flotsomnjetsom

    Maybe a few

    How many of your past/current students have you helped inspire a love of learning in? How many of them have shown improvement while with you? How many times have your students given you gifts?

    You know high school students generally don’t give teachers gifts of appreciation unless they mean it.

    Reply
  5. sleek_imager

    Should educators be prepared, when the occasion calls for it but not as a recurring thing, to work outside “normal hours” (whatever that is) in order to achieve some tangible benefit for their students?

    How many educators actually do that?

    Reply
    1. Krissy Gibbs Post author

      Yeah, I think that anyone should be prepared to work extra to achieve more benefit when necessary.

      Very few teachers do it. Some are rock stars and make me look like a slacker, but most are very lazy and apathetic.

      Reply
      1. cyclothemia

        actually

        Here’s another question-
        If your class is struggling a lot, when do you put down the outside-of-school work and give yourself a break? How do you balance the needs of the students and your needs as a teacher and person?

        Reply
      2. cyclothemia

        actually

        Here’s another question-
        If your class is struggling a lot, when do you put down the outside-of-school work and give yourself a break? How do you balance the needs of the students and your needs as a teacher and person?

        Reply
    2. Krissy Gibbs Post author

      Yeah, I think that anyone should be prepared to work extra to achieve more benefit when necessary.

      Very few teachers do it. Some are rock stars and make me look like a slacker, but most are very lazy and apathetic.

      Reply
  6. sleek_imager

    Should educators be prepared, when the occasion calls for it but not as a recurring thing, to work outside “normal hours” (whatever that is) in order to achieve some tangible benefit for their students?

    How many educators actually do that?

    Reply
  7. shadowsintime

    He was asking that question of himself sweetheart, and using you to hide behind.

    You need to be in this world, doing what you do. You DO change things. You are loved and adored and special – you deserve a lifetime of goodness to come that will be the pieces of all of your dreams.

    Fight back.
    Love you.

    Reply
    1. Krissy Gibbs Post author

      The only fighting I would like to do today is getting in a fist fight. 🙁 Although that is really just an urge to channel getting hurt that won’t make people so upset with me.

      I miss you.

      Reply
      1. urangme

        not that I normally care for it…but it has been a good long time since anyone has beaten the shit out of me…so you could channel, and make someone happy at the same time 🙂

        Reply
      2. urangme

        not that I normally care for it…but it has been a good long time since anyone has beaten the shit out of me…so you could channel, and make someone happy at the same time 🙂

        Reply
    2. Krissy Gibbs Post author

      The only fighting I would like to do today is getting in a fist fight. 🙁 Although that is really just an urge to channel getting hurt that won’t make people so upset with me.

      I miss you.

      Reply
  8. shadowsintime

    He was asking that question of himself sweetheart, and using you to hide behind.

    You need to be in this world, doing what you do. You DO change things. You are loved and adored and special – you deserve a lifetime of goodness to come that will be the pieces of all of your dreams.

    Fight back.
    Love you.

    Reply
  9. danaoshee

    How about whether you have any time anytime soon to get together?
    Unfortunately, I’m so far feeling pretty asleep every day after work (going from time off to a start up is being painful), so I’m going to have to suggest friday evening, saturday, or sunday, but I don’t think I have any weekend plans for the next few weeks. Whenever I say that I feel like I must be forgetting something, though.

    Reply
  10. danaoshee

    How about whether you have any time anytime soon to get together?
    Unfortunately, I’m so far feeling pretty asleep every day after work (going from time off to a start up is being painful), so I’m going to have to suggest friday evening, saturday, or sunday, but I don’t think I have any weekend plans for the next few weeks. Whenever I say that I feel like I must be forgetting something, though.

    Reply
  11. dorjejaguar

    Jesus fuck. You’re biological family is fucked.
    Its a miracle that you’ve survived them. I’m SO GLAD that you have. So so so so so so glad.
    You are so so beautiful, and strong and inspiring.
    I want you to be able to see that. If not now, one day.

    ~~~
    Odd thought. Has it occurred to you that your father was questioning himself with this very question and just projected it outwards?
    ~~~

    Take care of you.
    You are precious.

    Reply
  12. dorjejaguar

    Jesus fuck. You’re biological family is fucked.
    Its a miracle that you’ve survived them. I’m SO GLAD that you have. So so so so so so glad.
    You are so so beautiful, and strong and inspiring.
    I want you to be able to see that. If not now, one day.

    ~~~
    Odd thought. Has it occurred to you that your father was questioning himself with this very question and just projected it outwards?
    ~~~

    Take care of you.
    You are precious.

    Reply
  13. labelleizzy

    Who do you love?

    (make a list)

    What are you passionate about?

    (make a list)

    What is beautiful?

    (make a list)

    What are you grateful for?

    (make a list)

    ILY, hon. It’s been a hard week here also.

    Reply
  14. labelleizzy

    Who do you love?

    (make a list)

    What are you passionate about?

    (make a list)

    What is beautiful?

    (make a list)

    What are you grateful for?

    (make a list)

    ILY, hon. It’s been a hard week here also.

    Reply
  15. anima_fauxsis

    It’s hard not to have that question thrust on you by the very people who are supposed to validate and nurture your feelings of having a right to exist. Failures from parents like yours weedle into people’s souls and make a home there. That’s their failure, not yours. You deserve to live.

    Reply
  16. anima_fauxsis

    It’s hard not to have that question thrust on you by the very people who are supposed to validate and nurture your feelings of having a right to exist. Failures from parents like yours weedle into people’s souls and make a home there. That’s their failure, not yours. You deserve to live.

    Reply
  17. ditenebre

    OK, I’m going to show you just exactly what kind of selfish bitch I am. Let’s do the “It’s a Wonderful Life” thing of not existing and seeing what difference it would make in the world.

    Sometimes (a LOT of times here recently), it’s the sure and certain knowledge that my kids love me that keeps me going. And sometimes (very recently especially), it’s been the ONLY thing that has kept me going.

    You, dear heart, are officially one of my kids — done deal, no take backs. You did more than you even realize recently to help keep me going at a moment when I really wanted to give up – on life, the universe, and everything.

    (I’ll be so damned glad when Mercury gets its ass back in line.)

    Reply
  18. ditenebre

    OK, I’m going to show you just exactly what kind of selfish bitch I am. Let’s do the “It’s a Wonderful Life” thing of not existing and seeing what difference it would make in the world.

    Sometimes (a LOT of times here recently), it’s the sure and certain knowledge that my kids love me that keeps me going. And sometimes (very recently especially), it’s been the ONLY thing that has kept me going.

    You, dear heart, are officially one of my kids — done deal, no take backs. You did more than you even realize recently to help keep me going at a moment when I really wanted to give up – on life, the universe, and everything.

    (I’ll be so damned glad when Mercury gets its ass back in line.)

    Reply

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