I liked the meme that was “10 things you want to say to people”. I’m not going to pat anyone on the head and say, “Oh honey, of course I don’t mean you” so don’t bother asking for it.
1. Fuck you.
2. I find it particularly hypocritical that you allow me to be in a position you don’t want to be in yourself. Grow a fucking backbone.
3. Wow, you are so being used. I hope the sex is worth it.
4. Grow up. No really, grow up. It’s past fucking time you stop acting like a child.
5. Being prepared isn’t some magical occurance that just happens to some people. You need to take responsibility for yourself and actually get your shit done.
6. I hate you. I would feel kind of guilty for it, but I would cheerfully dance on your fucking grave you stupid piece of shit.
7. Quite whining about the situations you get yourself into over and over and over again. No one wants to hear it. You would be amazed at who all talks shit about you behind your back.
8. Stop patronizing me you fucker. And don’t correct my pronunciation when I am in a bad mood, dick.
9. Don’t ask him to touch you again. He isn’t yours. Ask your own boy to touch you.
10. I’m tired of being nice to you. Why the fuck can’t you do something well and truly deserving of me hating you so that I can stop feeling guilty for it.
This is one of those memes that I know doesn’t apply to me. Thank goodness.
Yay! I got mentioned.
Dick.
I don’t think she meant number
nineone in that way…*grin*
Hm. I only recognize one as perhaps being me, but maybe it was you. Or maybe we share one.
You know, I have a strong feeling I’d know in advance if you felt any of these things about me, ‘cuz you have a way of just putting things right out there, instead of swallowing them down. Even so, reading this, I still felt an instinctive impulse to duck!
yow.
Woah. I don’t think I’ve pissed you off nearly enough for most of them. But I could be wrong.
Guessing which ones apply to me: #4 & #10
But I’m not nice to you. 😛
ok you got me there
As something of a cognoscenti in this area, I think that all but one of those are perfectly reasonable things to say.
Except…
… for number 7. Which is just feeble and sophomoric and, well, redolent of number 4. Since when have vague refences to unspecified third parties had anything to do with _you_? Why should any decently adjusted human being really give a flying fuck about what shit some nameless people may (or may not) talk about behind your back?
Oh, sure, it may be _interesting_ to know, if you’re the one about whom the shit is being talked. But in this context, if one feels the need to add apparent credence and authority to the “quit whining” thing by hanging it on the heads of some nameless others, what does that say about oneself?
Nothing impressive, in my view…
Malc.
Malc, I’ve never been anything impressive in your view anyway so why should I care that in your view I have stepped down?
Well, obviously, whether or not you care is entirely up to you, and the notion that you (or anyone else) “should” care is patently ridiculous. (At least, until the universe wakes up and realizes that I should be the emperor of same, at which point, obviously, you should care, but I’m not holding my breath).
More importantly, how the heck do you know what my views are?
Oh, wait, you don’t! And (importantly) you can’t, for all values of “your” (in “your view”). You can’t even _know_ the views of people you’re close to… only what they choose to tell you of their views, which will _always_ be filtered in some way. ALWAYS. Hopefully, not in an important way for those closest to you, but this is the very nature (and, err, definition) of subjectivity, so you’re not going to get pure objectivity.
[ To make this clear: you may know _some_ of a person’s views, but without telepathy and a time machine, you can’t know _all_ of them. ]
But be that as it may: nine of your statements stood on their own merits. One, number 7, didn’t. If you need to (try to) add credence to an observation by alluding to some nebulous third parties who you claim are alleging something-or-other behind someone’s back, well, it says a whole fuck of a lot about you (and possibly those talking behind the back), and not so much about the person you’re addressing.
Still, the rationale behind the comment was the irony inherent in you labelling someone as being childish, and you then using a sophomoric tactic by trying to add credibility by innuendo.
You see, at the end of the day, you do know that there are people who say things about _you_ behind _your_ back, right? And you do understand that IN NO WAY makes those things true or relevant or useful or valid? (Sure, they may be true and relevant and useful and valid, but if it’s only said behind your back, who cares?)
All that said, I get it that you’re being pissy in general for your own reasons. And I see absolutely nothing wrong with being childish while one is being pissy. But you seemed to think that there was something unimpressive about it… and that struck me as, umm, incongruous.
Which takes us back to my first para, above….
Malc.
I judge your views of me on how you have treated me over the years. I have nothing else to go on.
Yes, this whole post is childish. I’m not denying that. Reacting like this to being generally frustrated is very childish. Yes, it is hypocritical of me to tell people to stop being childish while being childish. I don’t pretend I am perfect. My ability to be a grown up hits its limits once in a while.
I don’t actually include the “People are talking about you behind your back” as a validation of my beliefs or claims. I am basically aware that people talk about me behind my back. Some of that I have absolutely no control of so I try to ignore it as much as I am capable of doing so. If I did something in particular, repeatedly, that people talked about I would want to know that so I could change it. I hate that people talk about me behind my back. However, short of giving up all social contact, deleting my journal, and never leaving the house again I believe it is impossible for me to avoid it entirely. I do try to minimize it though. So when I am told “Dude, when you do ‘x’ people really talk” I take that as a kindness actually. I then try to stop doing ‘x’ because I don’t want the gossip mill to have extra ammunition.
None of her statements really “stand on their own merits”. That’s not because there’s anything wrong with them. It’s because they’re opinions. Number one, for instance, isn’t adding any particular verifiability or “proof”… I mean, come on, “fuck you” isn’t a tautology or a proven statement. It’s an opinion (yes, yes, expressed idiomatically, but it’s still an opinion in the *form* of a command, not an actual command).
She includes a bunch of opinion-slash-observations, such as “stop correcting my pronunciation[…]. Dick”, where the “stop correcting my pronunciation” implies an observation, but mainly she’s expressing an opinion. Number seven is pretty much like that. “You’re doing this stupid thing, and people notice.”
It would fail to follow the formal rules of argument if she were trying to use that as a reason that a particular person should change. But she’s not. Also, the formal rules of argument (ad hominem! Five yard penalty!) would be pretty silly to use here anyway. It’s not a formal persuasive argument nor a debate. It’s her expressing privately-held, logically unsupported opinions within a private space. Number seven fits right in if you assume that’s the purpose and forum.
(And by “logically unsupported” I don’t mean “logically unsupportable”. I mean she’s not textually justifying why she feels that way. She’s just stating opinions.)
Oh yeah? Well, your opinion is indefatigably malapropos. I’m not cognizant why you persevere in recalcitrant misinterpretation of the premeditated animus of this particular exposition of internal perturbation. Perhaps you infer that the affidavit which you find ungrounded percusses adjacent to your dwelling?
I hope these are meant for distant acquaintances. It would be sad to think you have surrounded yourself with people that make you so angry.