For some reason I feel sad this morning. I’m sitting here with the intermittent tear running down my face. I’m not thinking about anything. I don’t know why I feel like this.
Stupid hormones.
Down
5 Replies
Monthly Archives: November 2008
Adventurous
Today I tried new-to-me food. I had: pumpkin pie (it’s decent), pecan pie (WHAT WAS I THINKING NOT EATING THIS YEARS AGO?! It’s soooooooooooooo good), red tuna (not oh-my-god good, but I’ll eat it again), salmon (same as the red tuna), eel (creepy icki texture I don’t need in my mouth again), white tuna (it grossed me out enough I couldn’t eat the whole piece), a California roll (not incredible but I could learn to like it), and inari (very awesome).
For those of you who are asking yourselves why I am posting about this, I have declared loudly for years that I don’t eat anything that lives in water. This was a huge huge huge deal for me. I think I should get a prize of some kind.
I did all this fish tasting after a really good day at Dickens Fair. I have some really awesome friends. I don’t get to see any of them enough.
Mixed bag
Yesterday went extremely well. The only hitches in Thanksgiving were that everyone showed up late due to an accident on 880 so no one ate any of the appetizers (big freakin deal) and my sister/niece forgot the apple pie and rolls they promised (Sissy ran to Safeway and bought a pie and I had sneakily bought rolls Just In Case).
Everyone got along fantastically well. I was astonished. We had far fewer people than anticipated due to losing five people yesterday morning for a myriad of reasons. It was really nice though. I would go so far as to say I had a lot of fun. Towards the end of the evening Noah corralled all the youngsters into playing Give Me the Brain and Lord of the Fries for a while so I’m pretty sure he had a blast. 🙂 My mom and sister and I played Rummy and I lost abysmally but remained fairly cheerful. Shanna was on her absolute best behavior all day while playing by herself or being handed from relative to relative. Of course this means that my whole family is convinced that I have an abnormally mellow/good baby. 🙂
I did very little of the cooking and about half of the prep. Noah earned big fat credits that will probably turn into extra gaming time for him this weekend because he was so awesome. 🙂 The food was all thoroughly excellent and we have leftovers upon leftovers.
Even the rest of my mom’s visit was really good once the dog left. And the day we dropped the dog off I went to the high school I used to work at for a while and visited. Everyone made much of me telling me how much they miss me and how awesome I am. I felt really special and loved.
And over all of this wonderfulness is the pall that I am terrified of the comp exam. One more chance. I get one more chance before I have wasted years and years of work. I am so scared.
I’m not responding to each comment.
Yes I can retake the test. I can take the test one more time before I am failed out of the program. I am trying to decide if I want to take the test in April or November. No, there isn’t anything anyone can do.
Thanks for the comments. I appreciate them.
Fuck.
See, this is why I wasn’t getting my hopes up. I failed.
EC and to do
Have I mentioned that EC is just the niftiest darn thing imaginable? Being only somewhat diligent about it leads to four dirty diapers in a 24 hour period. Those happened when I was immersed in tasks and I didn’t bother to go potty her. That’s really neat! It seems that EC is the biggest thing I can do towards using less water in drought awareness. heh Noah is the one who does the most consistent pottying though and I have to give him mad-props. He gets up with her at least once and usually twice every night to sit on the potty for a while. Seeing as I wake up in the middle of the night disoriented and I stagger enough to hit walls, I’m grateful. Best daddy ever. 🙂
Today I need to:
– take my mom to the Great Mall. While I’m there I will go to Bev Mo for the last few Christmas presents.
– Put together chairs and the other table.
– Dig up the table cloths and napkins and wash the plates sitting in storage.
– Take the dog down to San Jose so it can stay with my sister (a compromise was reached–thank goodness).
– Figure out what I need to get at the grocery store and get it.
– Start the brining process for the turkey.
– Juggle stuff between main fridge and mini-fridge to make room for the turkey.
– Work on Power Point presentation for my Spanish class.
Uhm.. I think that’s it.
Yup, still hate dogs.
My mom is here. She informed me yesterday that she intends to stay with us till Friday. Last I heard before that she was going to stay here on Wednesday night and leave on Thursday, so this is a surprise. Honestly it wouldn’t so bad if she didn’t have a six month old Chihuahua who keeps SHITTING ON MY FLOOR. Have I mentioned that I have a baby who is right on the verge of learning to crawl who plays all day on the floor? Yeah. Fucking awesome.
wow.
I guess I’m more interesting than I thought. I’m still getting phone calls from a bartender I picked up down in Monterey oh… four years ago? Five years ago?
Heh. This amuses me.
suck
It’s really hard to say, “You know that thing I brought up? Can we forget I ever brought it up and go back to life before I said that?”
Sometimes, even when you get what you always wanted, you don’t get what you always wanted.
So many pictures.
I finally found a client for Picasa (I’ve been lazy about it) and I uploaded a messload of pictures, most of which no one has seen outside of my house. 🙂 Here is one of the most recent ones:
 |
| From Shanna |
Here is one of the oldest ones:
 |
| From Shanna |
Wow she’s changed. If you follow through to the album there are just shy of 200 pictures there now. In no particular order, though you can follow tags to see things by age. 🙂 She’s going to be six months old next week. I am amazed by how much she has changed!
Holidaze party
Party! (Before you get lost in details: remember that I ALWAYS APPRECIATE RSVP’S!!!! Yes, I’m yelling that.)
What: Holidaze party. You will probably already be in a daze by then, so what’s one more party?
When: Sunday, December 21st from ~1pm-7pm. If you are having a mandatory shut down the week after we can discuss staying later and drinking more seriously.
Where: Our house. Duh. (If you don’t know where we live let me know and I’ll send you the address.)
Why: Because parties are fun. I will be free of all school obligations and feeling celebratory. Because I will have cookies and cinnamon rolls and brownies and crumbles and all sorts of other stuff for folks to eat. [I will have gluten free stuff (I’ve already figured out what I’m doing), There will be dairy free stuff. And I’m going to try to have some diabetic friendly deserty something as well on principle. If you fall into one of these groups here is your social pressure to show up and appreciate my efforts. 🙂 ]
Who: Lots of folks I like and Noah likes. Which includes you, so you should come. 🙂
FAQs:
Should I bring anything? Only if you want to. Things that would be the most appreciated would be food of the savory nature. Dear God don’t bring sweets. If you want to bring alcohol make sure it is really really nice alcohol. We got rid of all the cheap shit and we don’t have any desire to replace it.
Can I bring anyone? Of course your SO is invited. If you want to bring several of your friends please check with me first. This is a fairly large invite list and this is NOT A DHP. So please don’t post this to everyone you know. 🙂 If it looks like only ten people are showing up I will probably say, “Sure–the more the merrier.” If it looks like 50+ people I will say, “Uhhh… well… uhhhhmmmm how strongly do you feel about them coming?” Mostly I just want to have a vague idea of how many people to prepare for at the event.
Will the party be kid friendly? I bloody well hope so because I have no where to hide my kid. I will point out that if you are the sort to have a mandatory shut down the next week and you want to hang out later drinking and you do something in the garage it would probably be fine.
Should I bring you a present? I love presents! I love presents so much that here is a link to my wishlist. But no, you don’t have to bring me a present. 🙂 Or Noah. Or even Shanna. 🙂
Thanksgiving update
Oh thank goodness. My cousin and her kids have other plans for Thanksgiving. We are only going to have 12 people. That’s way more manageable. 🙂
Early morning babbling
I have a lot on my mind but most of it isn’t real coherent. I’m going to spew here for a bit. 🙂
Not trying to hurt anyone’s feelings.
A chick is going on the outing tomorrow who I am not thrilled about seeing. On one hand I feel kind of growly about having to deal with her. On the other hand seeing for myself how isolating being a parent can be I don’t want to deny her the opportunity to meet new people.
HAVING COMPASSION IS REALLY FUCKING ANNOYING.
wanna be selfish. damnit.
Dreams and being stared at.
This morning I woke up in the midst of a very cool dream about and ‘s new house. There was a secret room (that was really more like a secret wing) with all kind of nifty features. I told “How can you not find a secret room!!” She said, “No one expects a secret room.” I said, “That’s like saying ‘No one expects the Spanish Inquisition’–they bloody well should have.” It was one of those cool dreams with flying and such.
And when I got up and checked my email I had an email from a reporter wanting to come on the freak breeder outing to interview people. I responded and said that was not a good idea. I don’t want people to show up to this event and be put on the spot for being weirdos, thankyouvermuch.
Reminder! Freak Breeder outing on Saturday
Are you a parent who feels like your friends group doesn’t quite know what to do with you now? Do you feel out of place at most parenting groups? Are you trying to figure out how to meet people outside of the parties you used to attend?
For the purposes of this invitation freak is defined as: genderqueer, kinky, poly, pagan, burner, goth, punk, trans, queer, bisexual, industrial, hippy, AP, or if you just feel like you don’t quite fit in at the local mommy group. You can be any of the above or none of the above. If you think you qualify as a freak, come on down.
It doesn’t matter if your kids are 6 months old, 6 years old, or 16 years old. You are welcome if you want to meet other freaks who can empathize with how being a parent has changed your life. You can be a bio-parent, adoptive parent, or an honorary parent. If you spend a noticeable chunk of your life parenting a child you consider yours, then you count as a breeder in my book. If you choose to reject the label of breeder, that’s fine too.
Come meet other freak breeders at the Oakland Zoo on Saturday November 15th. I will be arriving at 9:30 am. I will hang out outside of the gate till 10. If you would like to go I would love an RSVP so that I know approximately how many to expect: krissy AT bigrock it’s a dot com sort of address. If you RSVP I will also send you my cell phone number so that you can potentially join up with the group in the zoo if you are running a little late.
Please pass this on! Send it to your friends! Put it on your blog! Put it on mailing lists! I hope to meet a great many new freaks in addition to seeing the ones I already know.
I should probably stop talking to people.
Every so often I notice that I have been rude a lot for a period of time. It’s sometimes hard to figure out why I am doing so. I’ve been like that a lot lately. I’ve been rather snotty or nasty to more than one person in the last couple of weeks and I don’t have a good excuse for my behavior.
I’m sorry to everyone I’ve been rude to. Most likely you don’t deserve it. I’m going to think pretty hard on my behavior for a bit and try to figure out how to ditch my bad attitude.
Thanksgiving coming
So this year I’m hosting Thanksgiving dinner. The main thing that is fussy about it is that I have no idea who will want to come. It could be anywhere from 14 people to 24 people. That’s a big difference. That’s an enormous difference in terms of food prep. And seating arrangements.
I’m looking forward to seeing the mingled shock and horror when they discover no really, I don’t own a tv. I’m going to put out board games and cards. 🙂 It’s kind of fun looking at what I should make to eat. My family hasn’t had any experience with my cooking since I started being involved with Noah and boy howdy have things changed. The man introduced me to “full fat” and it’s improved pretty much everything that I cook. 🙂
This means I have two weeks to get my house really clean. No problem. 🙂
So this is what freedom feels like.
At the very least I have two weeks of freedom. Wow. That’s pretty incredible. I am still in my Spanish classes until May if I wuss out on the translation test, but honestly they take up about 7 hours of week for class time and homework time. That’s just not hitting my radar compared to what I’ve been doing for uhm years. My job is to take care of Shanna and do at least my share of housework. If I do more than my share of housework then Noah has more free time to spend with me and he’s in a generally better mood–which is a pretty damn good trade-off in my book.
I started off this freedom by cleaning up the garage to the point where we can now put our car in it! I’m thrilled because putting Shanna in and out in the rain really blows. I also cleaned the bathtub. Today I will putz through more cleaning and laundry. I also want to do cooking and prep stuff for meals for the week because we eat better when I do that.
My projects for this week include: putting furniture together, more house cleaning [we have a lot of cobwebs, finish dusting, finish cleaning the bathroom, maybe vacuum the living room, do a real scrub down of the kitchen], read more books to Shanna, start sorting Christmas stuff [I’m so excited about Christmas this year it isn’t even funny. I’m not doing the major decorating stuff till after Thanksgiving, but I can get a head start on stuff like Christmas cards so that I don’t feel much pressure in December], and enjoy the fact that I don’t have to read anything I don’t want to read! Do you know how many years it has been since I had no pressure about what to read?! For the past five years I have always had it hanging over my head that I needed to do reading for the exams. I haven’t always done it but the pressure was always present.
That said: what books do you like that I should add to my reading list? I may read a summary online and decide oh hell no but feel free to make suggestions. 🙂 I don’t even know what is out there past the canon…
Oh! and posts I want to write: “Ok snarky bitch, here is why I use cloth diapers despite your snotty article you sent me”, “Why are some books included in the canon while others are excluded”, and “Why I’m feeling some unpleasant feelings about the constant barrage of requests for money.”