I do not have to argue with every thing that makes me angry. It’s ok to walk away.
Shanna is arguing with every single thing I say and I feel like I am going to lose my mind. I’m feeling very frustrated with her yelling at me. And her saying, “Stop saying that!” is just… AHHHHHH
I’m really sick of nightmares. I don’t know why I am having so many. Not sleeping is keeping me on edge all day long and it’s not good for me.
I’ve had a headache for days. It is also keeping me on edge. I’m tired of wanting to whack my head off with an axe just to stop the pain.
So I’m bitchier than average but I’m not generally feeling bad. It’s kind of weird. In between bursts of anger I’m feeling pretty cheerful. Don’t like my mood? Wait three minutes. *sigh*
I need to get on ordering a new oven. I’ve been wanting to bake for a while and my oven just doesn’t work. I’m waiting until we have steady paychecks again. Then! A new oven! So thrilling! I am such a grown up.
I am ‘stripping’ a lot of diapers in preparation for selling them. I’m doing so much laundry it’s insane. Soon I can be done with this stage. I look forward to it. And I’m really unhappy about Shanna’s 100% regression to diapers. This is problematic when she’s outgrowing her diapers.
And through this all… Calli continues to be astoundingly mellow. Thank you second child.
Arguing
Dan went to a preschool which was a parent education co-op. We had to go to class every week w/o the kids. I learned a lot. One of the things which stuck with me was when the school director would go inot silence mode. She’s put on a special necklace so the kids and parents would know what was up. Then she would not be available to speak. She was always completely present – just not talking.
Amazingly the kids ‘got’ it. They ranged in age from 2 1/2 to almost 6.
Shanna may be regressing a bit now in response to Calli’s arrival. Apparently older kid regression can take on many sorts of manifestations. Toilet stuff doesn’t surprise me from her.
I snigger when I reflect that, as important as all this stuff was for me and our kids at the time, they remember exactly *none* of it now 🙂
Arguing was a favorite past-time of my daughter.
uh…
still is, unfortunately.
when she was little
i finally just told her
i was the dad
and she was the kid
and to quit arguing
because i wouldn’t stand for it.
a half-dozen 10-minute time-outs
solved the problem.
i didn’t like to take that tack.
but a little kid can’t always reason.
besides, it was better
than chopping her
into tiny, little bits
and flushing her
down the toilet.
the tactic didn’t ruin her – she still loves to argue.
Your oldest has been the center of her universe her whole life. She’s vying for all the attention she’s always had access to. she’s struggle with the change the only way she knows how – by pushing yer buttons.
it doesn’t make it any easier to deal with. but looking at it from her point of view makes it easier to understand why shitting your pants might be a reasonable choice for one so young.
when small, my kids were ***EXTREMELY*** jealous of one another. when things grew particularly tough, spouse and i would split them up -one each- and “love-bomb” them with positive attention until they couldn’t stand it anymore.
that helped a whole lot in our house.
good luck with the sucky headhurt thing.
If you need, I have half a cup of maternal strength you can borrow. I’m sorry that things are hard for you now. That really sucks.
And actually, shopping for a new oven sounds like a lot of fun. I love to cruise the kitchen departments of Home Depot just to dream. I haven’t the space for what I REALLY want, but it’s always nice to play for that mythical “some day”.
Needing a break from conversation is so totally valid. I used to be a nanny for a kid who adored my company, and whatever it was — talking about science, arguing, playing make-believe, etc. — he wanted to be with me all the frigging time. If I’d been there two hours a day it would have been one thing, but 8 or 10? And he turned down play dates with friends so that he could be with me alone.
But that wasn’t my kid and I was paid to be there. And at 8 or 10 hours, I went home. I wish, then, I’d thought of something like “20 minute no-talking breaks.”