Ok, to be fair I came to Disneyland Paris, not really France.  But the thing is, I came here because I wanted to have the Disney experience while dealing with the time change.  I figured that here my kids crying wouldn’t be that big of a deal.  To be fair, that part is fine.  But when I have to make 8 phone calls (many to an outside company because Disney doesn’t want to be involved?) and go down to the lobby and throw a HUGE temper tantrum and tell them that I will check out of the hotel if they do not find a god damn ethernet cable longer than 18″ so that my husband can actually usefully work… that’s not the Disney experience.  If I had called from a room in California and said, “Hey.  Our internet isn’t working and my husband has to work remotely.  What can be done about this?”  The problem would have been fixed.  Pretty much instantly.  They would have brought me a 30′ cable in 10 minutes and said, “Oh Ma’am!  I hope this is adequate!”  And I would think, “Whoa.  Overkill much?”  And *that* dear friends, is why I pay for Disney.

But this is France.  And here you have French people.  French people who when you are wandering the hotel in the middle of the night and you say, “Hey, because you are behind the bar putting away stuff can you hand me a glass so I can help myself from the tap?”  They tell you to go to the restaurant.  At 3 in the morning.  When the restaurant won’t open for 4 hours.  Bitch.  Seriously.  Fuck you with your fucking broom you petty bitch.  Because she understood enough English to communicate.  I had to seriously browbeat the shit out of the staff before we got an ethernet cable and when we did, most of the staff was maintaining a stone wall that there was nothing they could do for us.  Some random bellhop went and found a cable and brought it out.  Then of course reception tried to act like they had been great.

In the park people keep staring at me.  Ok yes, my hair is AWESOME.  But when you stare at me with a sneer on your face so intense that your upper lip never comes off your nose?  Fuck you too.  And throughout the park I swear to God people are getting whiplash because when one person from a group spots me they say something and then the whole group turns to stare at me with fairly hostile expressions.

I feel the need to point out that I’m being oversensitive and such right now, but no really.  They aren’t subtle.

Of course I’m meeting a lot of fun British and American people.  I suspect that part of it is, this is the *cheapest* time of year to be here.  So you have fancy International people who can afford to travel (even with the discount it’s still expensive) and the cheap ass local assholes.  I am not seeing France at its best.  But right now I believe I will never set foot in this country again and I will talk a lot of shit about it.  At this point I’m frustrated with a lot of things.

But you know what?  I’m really enjoying the time with the girls.  That is quite lovely.  Shanna and I are getting along really well.  Even with the massive sleep deprivation.  Calli is cutting two teeth while massively jet lagged.  We’re having *fun*.  Actually we are.  🙂  She thinks that Disneyland is the coolest thing EVAR.  She loves all the rides.  A few employees have tried to discourage me from putting her on rides and I tell them to back off and she laughs through the whole thing.  It’s wonderful to be near.

I’m really struggling with my feelings.  I feel like everyone in the world hates me.  Noah and I have been having a hard time finding the right balance of needs.  In the past 4 nights (it is currently 12:40am) I have had ~12 hours of sleep total.  And I can’t sleep.  I’m listening to “Born This Way” on repeat.  It’s not really a great song.  But I’m really struggling right now.  I’m closer to the edge than I want to admit out loud.  I don’t feel like I’m at 50% right now and sleep deprivation doesn’t help.

Yeah.  But I love my hair.  Even if the asshole French people are sneering at me.  🙂  I don’t know how I’m doing.  The good moments are starting to outnumber the bad but the bad are still really intense for me.  I kind of feel like right now I’m a plant that was blown flat in a storm.  I’m not ready to push up straight again, but I’m growing in any direction I can.  It has to be enough because I don’t have anything else.

Oh, and we couldn’t stay in the hotel I booked in London because we showed up and were told that when we went from 3 to 4 people in our party we had to be bumped to a 6 person dormitory.  If we wanted privacy we could pay for all 6 bunkbeds.  Uhm, no thanks.  So poor Shanna had to be drug out into the freezing rain again.  Other than that London was ok when I wasn’t being overly anxious.  But then again… we weren’t there 24 hours.  Obviously, not sleeping.  Oy.