“I’ve been following your blog for awhile, I never comment. However I couldn’t not comment on this. I’m not judging you by any means but I couldn’t pass saying this.
How can you bring someone to your house who you admittedly barely know and met through adult sex venues at that, and let him meet your daughters? That is truly scary. I think a mother should be extremely selective who she brings in the house and to top it all off lets meet the kids. Just my 0.02 cents. “
First, I’m not mad at you. It’s your opinion and you are welcome to it. I met this guy probably eight years ago. When I used to attend BaGG he was a regular there and we had a number of nice conversations, but I wouldn’t say I am close to him. He used to be housemates with one of my girlfriends. I’ve known her for 14+ years and she lived with this guy for years. This guy is also good friends with my ex-boyfriend Spot. He’s not exactly a complete stranger though I understand how it sounds that way.
He was in my dining room for less than two hours with my children. We talked about She-Ra and raising kids and the fact that his mom walked out on him when he was a toddler. Both kids kept their clothes on. We talked about our social anxiety. We talked about what things we do to try and talk to people without feeling dirty and gross and bad. I felt quite comforted by his presence. He’s a nice person and I’d like to get to know him more. I feel completely comfortable with the fact that he won’t challenge my monogamy.
But he’s one of those sick perverts. And I shouldn’t let him in my house. I’m really not better. I guarantee you that if I trotted out my kink résumé it is a lot more offensive than this guy’s. But he is suspect and probably gross. Because he’s a man. And kinky.
I feel tainted and like I shouldn’t ever be alone with my kids. You know, I’m one of those sick people too. I’ve done some pretty disgusting things. I have gotten off on some really disgusting things. Obviously I am too dirty to be here.
I wonder when someone is going to figure out that people like me are just inherently bad and shouldn’t be around children. It should probably happen soon before the irreversible damage is done. I’m sure it is inevitable. It’s not like I’m going to ask this guy I don’t know to babysit. But obviously there is something wrong with me if I think it is ok to let a raging pervert in my house to talk to my daughter about cartoons.
I’m not mad. But I do feel like I am going to be wrong forever and ever amen. I should never speak to anyone again. Do you know how many people I am close to who have never been to an adult-only-sex-venue? I can probably count them on my hands. I guess that means I shouldn’t ever let my kids meet anyone at all. You never know what they do on Saturday night.
I went to my first BDSM club with a mom I met through a homeschooling group. While we were there we met a single dad who is a teacher. Two weeks later that single dad and I took our kids to the Exploratorium together. *shrug*
My kink friends don’t scare me nearly as much as other people. Someone is comfortable with the sexuality and are okay with how they deviate from the norm seem much healthier to me than the “I’ve only ever had sex with my spouse, at home, lights off, missionary.” sorts of people. I feel like a lot of those people are hiding a lot… if it’s so bad that they have to keep it hidden, I feel like I should be afraid to have them around my kids…. but we already know I’m pretty broken. 😉