Last night I dreamed that we had moved away and been gone for a while. When we got back to the bay area we went to a huge party in SF. The kids weren’t with us. I saw people I knew from the dance community, I saw former students, and I saw tons of people from the scene. I spent a lot of the night hanging out with Peter feeling how sad it is that we didn’t really date. One of my former students leaned in and told him, “It was probably for the best. She is really high maintenance.”

Late in the “night” a bunch of people all decided to sleep at this one house. I slept cuddled up to Noah, of course. But when I had to climb out to go to the bathroom I had to go past Tom. He grabbed my leg and kind of pulled me down. He pressed his face into my leg and cried. He choked out that he missed me. I sat with him and stroked his hair and cried too. Eventually in the dream I got up to go to the bathroom. I didn’t come back in a way that went past Tom. I was afraid of what might happen.