So I was reading this article about how 50 Shades of Grey Gives Bondage a Bad Name. She was quite scandalized by the use of cable ties instead of rope. She adamantly says that real players don’t use cable ties they use thick rope to prevent damage.
That’s for those folk what know the difference between fantasy and reality. I have been restrained with cable ties quite a bit. Want to see pictures? In a variety of different postures. Once I was even hog tied with cable ties face down in the bath tub. Then my partner filled it. Good times!
I love when people loudly say that bdsm has no correlation to abusive childhoods. Except in those rare, freak cases–of course. *wave*
While I was running today the Prince song “Gett Off” came on and I got to wander down memory lane. Mmmm hunting. I remember hunting. That was one of my favorite songs to listen to as I got ready to go out and find sex. I wanted to go find someone who was looking for me and they don’t know it yet.
I can’t hunt with witnesses. I went to the parties of friends-of-friends and then I avoided the one person I knew. You can usually determine early in a party if there is any prey lurking about. Men with high libidos have a way of checking out women. You can tell the ones who have been without sex for a while. They squirm once in a while as they look around. I would hang back and watch them for a few minutes. I should only go after men who are willing to look at many women as potential. The kind of guy who stares wistfully after one woman all night is unlikely to want to fuck someone on the side.
I like big blustery guys. They are cocky and domineering and usually quite insecure. It’s certainly not all I go for. There have been some men with slight builds and everything in between. I don’t hunt for women like this. It’s different.
I like approaching someone who looks like he can be funny and at the center of the crowd but right now he is just sitting on the side. It’s best to approach prey when they are alone. It is less pressure. The stakes are lower to start with and you can raise them much faster.
I find that the best way to get people to have sex with me is to make knowing personal commentary. I point out things that are stark staringly obvious… that they believe no one knows about them. I am quite good at that. I can make people feel seen. Once you start having a connection and a conversation I just move closer. I reach out and almost touch them and visibly stop. Oh wait. I forgot. I don’t know you yet. I don’t know if it is ok to touch you.
Sometimes it isn’t. I like knowing that early.
Usually it is. Most people go through life pretty touch starved. Prey often don’t recognize themselves as such early on. They seem to believe no one would want them that way. I think that part of the reason my hunting technique works so well is because most people do not believe they are attractive and are happy to jump on any opportunity in life to prove otherwise to themselves. I try not to disappoint.
When I want things to move towards sex I start abruptly switching the conversational topic (might about books, computers, politics, religion, whatever) to something slightly inappropriately personal. Did you see that your seam is starting to come loose… here? Then rub my finger up the center of their thighs. I love the gasp and wide eyes. People really do fall into types and I can smell my prey. Not everyone reacts this way to my behavior. Only prey. If someone isn’t prey then they have usually made it clear long before this point and I move on.
Do you know how I have been so successfully slutty? I’ve been turned down hundreds of times. You can’t take it personally. Move on. Someone else will be interested.
In my wilder and friskier youth the next move was sitting on a lap and lowering my voice so my prey has to lean in even closer to hear me. It doesn’t matter what I talk about at this time. I can talk about the food at dinner and it is an obviously irrelevant point to what we are clearly doing. If I talk about something explicitly non-sexual I have the opening to act almost surprised by the growing cock underneath me while I squirm. It’s awesome.
Then comes the abrupt switch to talking about Responsible Adult Things. So, how often do you get STD testing? (I did every three months when I was active.) When was the last time? What were the results? How many partners have you had since then? What kind of protection do you use? Then I find a euphemistic way of alluding to the fact that I get around and I explain where I am right then. For a while I had a number of people in the poly community all getting tested every three months so that I would have unprotected oral sex with them. I felt like a good influence. I got to talk about HPV and HSV in detail. People end sex with me a lot more educated than they start.
I miss the hunt because I miss having to decide what kind of sex I want and then go out and find it.
Kids woke up.
Tasty
😀
a. My pre-hunting CD was the Queer as Folk soundtrack, specifically #2 on both CDs, Absolutely Not and You think you’re a man.
b. ha, I have two main ways of laying out the bait, My five step flirt method which i have taught to at least 6 people (mostly SV nerds). The other is to fall asleep. Preferably on their bed. (This is back when everyone’s living space was one room only.)
c. I’ve been super bad about those Responsible Adult Things. Bad in that I’m probably average American, but know enough to know better. And experienced enough (and like my men experienced enough) to matter.
Reading your blog feels oddly familiar and yet different. I was never sexually abused but spent a lot of time around deeply dysfunctional adults as a child and I think that scarred me. I can sympathize with a lot of the things you say about seeking approval from others because you can’t get it from yourself. Unlike you though I dealt with it by becoming a prude and later a compulsive sadist… I think I would have preferred your approach.
Well, there are certainly fun parts. 🙂