I haven’t medicated. Maybe that should be the first thing I change. Instead I am rocking myself and chewing holes in my cheeks.

I keep telling myself that it won’t be so bad. These conversations won’t be that bad. I’m not going to incur huge punishment. Ok, so I won’t get everything I want in life WHAT ELSE IS NEW?!

I’ve been rocking a lot today. And bouncing. It is “self-soothing”. I am vibrating. Oh festive and fun.