I had a thought about the euphoria of my Bonus Kids. It wasn’t like that early on. I’ve been keeping them for extended periods for years. The early visits were flat out nightmares. Screaming, crying, awful. They were so hard. When they were over I would hide in a dark room with a cool cloth on my head and shake.

Now things are a lot better. Now we’ve figured out how to get along. And that feels euphoric. Now we have snuggly giggle fests full of cuddles and kisses.

When I’m comparing my first visit with a new set of kids to the experience I have after years of work with my Bonus Kids… that’s unfair to everyone involved. Maybe this experience is less euphoric because these kids have never made me suffer.

How does that play into bonding?