I spend a lot of time wondering if I’m a shitty friend because I am so controlling. Today one of my friends came over and I spent a lot of time being bossy. I really hope I am not a shitty person for this.

I walked her through which assistance programs she can apply for since her abusive ex-husband is withholding support. I talked to her about where to call for legal assistance and advice. I wrote out web addresses and phone numbers and apologized for giving her one more thing to take care of.

I told her that she really needs to consider moving home so her family can help her even though her kid doesn’t want to. She is going to continue to struggle here and it’s just not fair to struggle this hard by herself.

Of course I will miss her. We can write letters and call on the phone and Skype. Distance doesn’t mean the end of a relationship.

But I can’t be all the support you need and you have that support in this world and you deserve it.

If I kept you here so I could feel happy about having you in my life… I would be bad. But I hope being bossy isn’t bad. I hope I am not doing harm by giving her advice and telling her that she needs help.

I can’t not say it to her. She is looking more ill by the month. I’m worried about her. She’s suffering so much. She needs help. So I’m bossy as shit. I just have to hope this is not one more sin stacking up against me.