On Friday I was just not up for the lesson I was supposed to be teaching. Of course I felt massive guilt about this, but my students comforted me by telling me that they are content waiting until next week because if I wait until I feel better to do the heavy stuff I will teach it so well they will get lots out of the lecture whereas if I push myself when I am distinctly under the weather they won’t get as much. Such sweet little manipulators.

So I told them to get out a piece of paper and write down any questions they have that they have always been afraid to ask. They can get anonymous answers so no one has to feel silly or stupid or ignorant. I maintained absolute discipline and fierceness through the answering–no one got to laugh at a question they thought was stupid because it was probably hard for someone to get up the nerve to ask.

The questions ranged from silly/stupid/trying to get a rise out of me to fairly deep questions to things that are probably scaring the shit out of them. I answered everything completely bluntly and honestly and straighforwardly with no sign of shame or hesitation. It went remarkably well. I can’t remember all of the questions (there were probably a hundred or so) but here is a sampling:

Can you get AIDS from oral sex?
What is phone sex?
Does sex hurt?
How young is too young to be a parent?
My sister is 12 and likes to pretend she has a penis and that it hurts her just as much as it hurts a boy when she is hit between the legs–what is wrong with her? Is she stuck in the toddler phase? (We are studying Freud and his phallic obsession stage blew their little minds.)
Why did you want to be a teacher?
Why are you moving away?
Why don’t you want to stay with us?
How many times a week do you have sex? (I was a little funny with this one–I told them not as often as I used to because it is uncomfortable right now.)
Can a transvestite make a baby by itself? (They didn’t understand the difference between a transvestite and a hermaphrodite so I told them and I explained what being transgendered or transsexual is as well.)
Can two transvestites have sex together?
Why are boys such horndogs?/Why do boys have urges?
Are all men perverts?
Are there teachers who hate kids? If so, why do they teach?
Do you hate any of the teachers at this school? If so, who? (I declined to give names but I did say that there are teachers I don’t have much respect for.)
What _is_ love?
What makes a boyfriend different from a good friend? How do you know when you are ready to have a boyfriend?
If my boyfriend wants to kiss another girl, should I let him or should I dump him?
How can I stand up to my super oppressive parents?
Why do some guys ejaculate so quickly?
What is testosterone?
Do the carpets always match the drapes?

That’s all I can remember right now. There were some really stupid ones that I didn’t bother to answer because they were just being silly. I frequently prefaced my answers with statements about how I have my beliefs about these subjects and my beliefs are very different from what many other people think and it’s ok that we don’t agree. I am not trying to convert anyone to being like me, I just want the kids to know that opinions like mine exist and they should be aware of that. (Though it would be nice to convert the kids. 😉