I found this chick through mothering.com. As much as MDC is kind of wearing through my patience I have learned some neat stuff there. So here is a really interesting post about how toddlers are/can be triggering to abuse victimes. It gave me a lot to think about: Raising My Boychick
Wow, that’s a great expression of a concept I’d been thinking around the edges of a little recently. In particular, nursing has been feeling borderline nonconsensual to me and I’m amazed at how angry I sometimes feel even though in general I think I’m a really laid-back parent. Hmmm, thanks for posting.
I was super super mellow throughout Shanna’s babyhood and I’m having an increasingly hard time. When she was a baby my body-space issues never manifested. Now that she feels like a different person I am starting to have problems with my skin crawling because she wants to be on top of me all the flippin time. And she is starting to sleep for 7-8 hours at night without nursing basically every night but she is wanting to nurse a lot more during the day and I’m starting to feel upset about it. She used to nurse all night long (not great) but not nurse much during the day. AHHHH!!!
This concept is why I get frustrated with the MDC types who insist child led nursing/weaning means never saying no. I think mothers deserve to keep their personal boundaries intact, and it’s a healthier model for the kid to know that mama’s body deserves respect. I’m nursing my 27month old, but I have boundaries. No more night nursing. No sticking your hands down my shirt and grabbing. Ask politely. (“more boobs please!”) If you use your teeth, I will ask you to stop, and if I’m uncomfortable I get to say no. Basic rules that apply in life.
Yeah, I’m growing more and more disenchanted with MDC. The Stalin-esque behavior gets old.
I totally agree with you about nursing manners. I believe that if his relationship isn’t working for me then I need to change it. (Specifically in reference to nursing.) I’m pretty dedicated to child-lead weaning but I get to control access to my body
thankyouvermuchfuckyouverymuch.