The past few days have been quite a roller coaster of emotions. Dude. I realized sometime last night while feeling quite depressed and upset while snuggling up to a napping Noah that my stomach had been hurting ridiculously badly. Hey wait, my stomach pain seems to be related to severe stress. Not always, but often enough. Then I started thinking about Jaguar’s comment. Time to set some damn priorities.

So I got up and sorted my grading into: not grading, grading over Christmas break, and I should do it now. The do it now pile is quite diminuative and I did most of it in about 30 minutes last night.

I decided that I could let guilt over Noah’s family eat me from the inside out or I can recognize that they have had problems for decades longer than I have known them and this so isn’t my problem. He is going to make whatever decision about them that he feels is appropriate. I don’t have to like it. I am feeling more confident that he won’t force me to have unhealthy contact though. Yay for supportive partners!

I’m getting my feet under me with comp and lit so I don’t feel as unhappy in that quarter. My unit on A Raisin in the Sun is shaping up and I will be doing the next two units over Christmas break so I don’t have to stress about it during school time. Really this is all good news. My goal is to work the first week during the day and take the second week OFF. Damn the kids. 😉

And I’m out of BTSA. I fucked up on paperwork so all of those awful trainings I have done so far? Yeah… useless. I will have to do them again next year. But, I get a lot more time to myself this year. I don’t know if it was the best call or not, but I’m glad I did it. I need more time to myself right now.

And this weekend I want to decorate for Christmas! It’ll all work out. I have faith. And that Noah guy is still the bestest thing ever.