You know how I thought I was getting sick? Yes. Lots of puking. Other uhm things came out of me. When other uhm things come out of me at such a rate and speed that it kind of freaks me out that’s not so healthy. And I started bleeding this morning. fuck my life.

But the better news is that after crying all night last night I spent the morning reading a book about the suicidal mind, saw some things that were seriously educational about my specific issues, then I went on to have a good day.

My family is very nice to me. I am so grateful that I am treated well at this point in my life. I struggle to be worthy of it.

Yesterday evening I was still feeling kind of sad. I turned on music. My whole family danced and laughed and was silly together. It was so much fun.

I get to belong here. I’m allowed to be here. Forever. I didn’t think I would ever have that. I thought that belonging was something other people got to have.