Today is a high anxiety day. I was fairly social yesterday. Far more so than usual. I went and mingled among a wide variety of different social circles and had to manage very different kinds of interactions. I’m exhausted. I’m also tired because I haven’t slept properly in years. I’m being snippy with Noah and Sarah and it’s not fair.
I’m rather a work-a-holic. I tend to say that I have a Puritan work ethic. I feel terribly guilty if I’m not doing something productive basically at all times. I don’t believe in idle hands. This is part of why Noah and my therapist are so enthusiastic about me smoking. Because I don’t do it around the kids I have an enforced period of isolation. That’s when I can find the time to write and think.
When I slack I stop working on my list of priorities.