I went and hunted down one of my kids today. A girl who hasn’t been to class in two weeks. The girl I flipped off. The one who wrote a really awesome book report and hasn’t been back to class to see her grade. The one that reminds me a *lot* of me at that age, down to the same stupid clothes. (Shouldn’t styles have changed by now?!)

I pestered her for about thirty minutes. Turns out she is trying to get into an alternative ed program so that she can actually finish high school next year. Right now she has 50 credits and she should have around 150. Doh. She will be withdrawn from regular classes sometime in the next two or three weeks so she has decided not to bother going anymore anyway. I drove her *nuts*.
“Well, you aren’t withdrawn from class yet. That means you better start coming to class or I am going to start following you around and bugging you all of the time.”
“What is the point? I don’t learn anything in my classes.”
“Excuse me?!!!?!? You don’t learn anything in my class?!?!?!?!!”
“Ok. That’s true. I think I have learned more from you than any other teacher I have had in high school.”
“Ok, that means you will show up to at least my class until you are withdrawn from regular school.”
“Are you serious?”
“As a heart attack. You need to get your ass to my class and get as much from it in the short time we have left together as you can. The stuff I am teaching you will help you in the alternative ed program and in the rest of your life. I am going to be pissed off at you if you waste this time.”
“Are you serious?”
“Yes. Now are you going to be there on Monday or do I have to drive to your house and drag you by your hair?”
“Fine. I’ll be at your class on Monday. But you can’t make me go to any other class.”
“Ok. Oh, and you have to go to the bookroom and pick up The Great Gatsby and read chapter one by Monday. We are starting a new unit.”
“There is no way.”
“Wanna make a bet? Lets go to the bookroom together right now and get the book. And you will have the first chapter read by Monday or I will make your life hell on earth.”
“I don’t want to go right now. I am in the middle of something.”
“If I don’t drag you right now you won’t go and I want you to go.”
“I’ll go. I promise.”
“I don’t think I should believe you.”
“WHAT?!?! You didn’t just say that.”
“Yes I did. You won’t go if I don’t go with you.”
“Yes I will. But how long is chapter one?”
“Around 25 pages.”
“What?! Ok, I’ll have like 50% read by Monday.”
“That isn’t good enough. You will have the whole thing read by Monday or I will be eating lunch with you and your friends and drive you crazy for a month.”
“Oh my god. You would totally do that. Ok fine. I’ll read it, but you have to bring me cookies. Just me.”
“Excuse me? You expect me to bribe you to get your work done?”
“Yes.”
“No.”
“Ok fine. I’ll do the reading anyway.”

I finally left her alone.

I’m bringing her cookies. 🙂 She only gets them if she passes the reading quiz though.