Today the things I could do include: Dickens Fair, kinky flea and/or fandango, and helping friends move.

I think I will stay home and catch up on all the crap I have to do. My lesson plans have to be so detailed that it will blow the mind of my supervisor when she shows up on Wednesday. I assume they are all going to be 2-3 pages in length. 🙁 I need to do the take home final for my assessment class. I need to catch up on grading because I am woefully behind. I need to finish cleaning my kitchen and do dishes. I need to spend some freakin time with my cat. I need to finish up The Mayor of Casterbridge and write all of the reading quizzes for the week. I need to figure out what activity I am going to do with my Gatsby kids the week after Christmas break to help them become more involved in the book and wrap up their understanding.

I would like to bake cookies. I would like to start cinnamon rolls, but I don’t think that will happen this year. Cookies are doable though. I feel disappointed by the acknowledgment that I simply will not be able to get to cinnamon rolls this year. It is a time and energy and even a space thing. Maybe I will make some after Christmas just for the hell of it? I also don’t need to make a triple batch. Just one batch for me. It would take less time, energy, and space. Hm. Think about that later.

I want my house completely tidy today. I am very close to tidy right now, but I’m just not there. I also need to vaccuum somewhat desperately.

Oh, btw… I changed my plans for this weekend radically from what I thought I was going to do.

See, I was supposed to go see Marcus on Friday night but he sent me a text message around 5:30 saying he was falling asleep so there was no point in me coming up to the city to see him. He hadn’t slept at all the night before and had to be at up 5 for work. I wasn’t annoyed. Besides, I didn’t want to drive anyway. So I stayed home and cleaned and watched movies and tried to talk people into visiting me to no avail.
Saturday morning I did more cleaning and watched another movie and then went to therapy. I don’t know if it was good or not. There is a {my shit} post coming up about all the drama that happened yesterday. Anyway, I did help friends move yesterday. Not as much as I wanted to/thought I should, but damnit–I need to get the freak over my guilt complex. They weren’t complaining. After helping them move a friend asked me about my plans for the evening and I admitted to being ambivalent about a couple of options. More discussion lead to us carpooling up to black sheets instead of the housewarming I originally had planned. (I called the host and he said he understood. He would have been the only one I knew and it was not where my head was.) I had a blast at black sheets. It was the first time I have ever gone and explicitly not wanted to play. I brought some rope in case I saw a friend who might be fun to tie up, but that didn’t happen. I spent the night talking and being social. I had a little bit of touch time with a friend (all the touching was on the face/neck/shoulders/arms) and that was nice. TCGOTN (the creepy guy of the night) was some dude named George who tried like hell to talk me into several things I didn’t want and I flat told him no repeatdly. I did let him massage my neck though. Heh. Hey, it wasn’t using him… he had fun too. He wanted it to get more friendly and implicitly and explicitly asked for contact with my breasts/sex/and for me to come over to his house sometime this week. I told him no to all things. Well, I told him that he should wait on touching my breasts until he is quite certain he won’t sustain bodily injury for the affront. I told him that I was not interested in any casual sex at this point. And I told him that I have no interest whatsoever in spending time with him again. He asked me if I would use his email address if he gave it to me and I told him probably not. heh. *shrug* I never asked him to pay attention to me and I didn’t try to encourage him. If he is annoyed by not getting more, oh well. I kept my clothes on all night, well except for a brief stint in the hot tub. I had a great time and I am glad I went. I am even more glad that I didn’t engage in anything sexual. I would feel really bad about myself today if I had just because that isn’t what I really want and the compromise would have been negative for my self esteem. Go me. I slept on the way home (thank goodness my friend didn’t mind) because it was after 1 and that is extremely late for me. We stopped and had a donut in the home stretch though. 🙂

I think the change in plans was awesome.

So uhm, yeah. Lots of good stuff. I will write {my shit} then I need to get my ass busy.