Tag Archives: pressies

Stop and appreciate the moments of joy

Leave a reply

I’ve done ALL THE THERAPY and one of the things I’ve learned is that when you are depressed or anxious or both at once… it’s extra important to stop and take moments to notice a job well done. Even if you feel like a fuck up all the time, that’s probably not true. Sometimes you get it right. Stop then. Notice. Try to let your brain experience a few moments of feeling something other than self hatred.

Right now I am watching the cats climb around on the climbing gym in the middle of the lounge. It is one of the most charming sights I’ve ever seen.

Our lounge is definitely the largest room I have ever had in a house I have lived in. It’s easily twice the size of the living room we had in California and it has a sloping roof that goes up to about 12 or 15 feet. (I have to measure soon. I will know for sure then.) The room is pretty packed right now. I spent all day moving stuff around. My family never once challenged me on why I wanted to do all the shifting, they just helped.

The Christmas tree is massive and the pile of presents is kind of ridiculous. Well, ridiculously large looking but an awful lot of it are things we genuinely need. EC has a bed frame in there. We all got stuff for dealing with the climate–that’s a big deal! There are kitchen things in the pile that we will use for making family food. There are hair supplies and soaps and bath bombs (not a necessity) and face cleaners.

Ok, there are some purely frivolous things too. My kids didn’t ship their toys to Scotland; they got rid of almost everything they owned. There’s a doll house and dolls and toddler learning toys. There are some bath toys. Lots of art supplies; both of the big kids have completely used up their stock of art paper so now they each have a new sketchbook. There is a sewing machine; EC has asked for one for a few years now. It seems like a great time. MC begged for a keyboard. Given that every time my children get the chance to bang on a piano they spend hours doing that… it seems like a pretty reasonable gift.

And books. Of course there are books. More books than I would normally buy in one holiday but A) they were phenomenally cheap and B) we are absolutely book starved. No regrets.

It’s a lot. I won’t do a Christmas this big again, probably in my whole life. We are still just starting and after this we won’t have room for so much.

The play gym can fit down in the apartment when the lounge needs to be used for another purpose. It also folds up for handy storage! I love it. I could never have gotten something like this in California. Here an outdoor play structure like I had there would be fairly unusable a big chunk of the year.

Circumstances change.

Our strict budget starts in a week. I’m ready.

When I turn off the seizure causing blinking lights (the kids love them) and just have the still lights to illuminate this room, it looks pretty magical. I will leave on some lights all night long so that when the kids wake up they will come in to a lighted room. The sun isn’t up till after 9am right now. I told them they couldn’t come out till 5am. They have watches! Monitor your own behavior! But the light are necessary.

The future is unknowable. I don’t know what challenges will come. But right now, we are all set for a magical Christmas.

Stop. Notice. This is something I helped create too. We did it.

I think I can go to sleep now, at a reasonable hour. I have a fun day ahead of me.

Because it is fun!

7 Replies

I got:
-two super fancy pots. Enamel coated cast iron! Whoooo!
-a super sharp large knife
-TWO cool teapots for one. I think word is getting around that I’m drinking more of it. 🙂 (One is beautiful for loose leaf tea, which is mostly what I drink.)
-the crunchy lunch set of my dreams <3 -a wide assortment of delightful bath products -a great spatula -super awesome socks -a really long beautiful pearl necklace (Shanna picked it out!) -two beautiful bracelets -a great handcuff necklace -gorgeous Edwardian underthings -comfy jammies Noah got: -this awesome book from Santa
-a bunch more books (xkcd vol 1, Watership Down, Strega Nona, The Reluctant Dragon, uhm something I can’t recall from his parents)
-an interesting old fashioned microscope
-Star Wars stuff! cookie cutters, pancake molds, a spatula (Darth Vader), and a fun cupcake set where you can have the little guys battle
-kitchen towels and a good apron
-a knife sharpener
-a rotary cheese grater
-a variety of neat card games for playing with kids
-sushi tie

Calli got specific to her:
-clothes 🙂
-a plush Minnie ornament

Shanna got (much to be shared when Calli gets bigger):
-a wooden activity cube
-a shape/animal stacking game
-a plush Mickey ornament
-bath foam letters/numbers
-magnetic letters and numbers for the fridge
-a pouch for carrying around dolls/stuffed animals
-a set of play silks
-art supplies (window crayons, watercolor paints, a little notebook, and a cool pencil)
-3 more anamalz
-a Minnie purse
-a couple of nail polishes
-a marble sorter/tower
-pirate water bottle
-clothes + jammies
-set of tablecloth and napkins for her little kitchen
-a medical toy set
-practice chop sticks
-lego silverware
-this big, neat ladybug tent!

an awful lot of that came from out of town relatives or were stocking stuffers. we are very very privileged to experience such an overwhemingly wonderful Christmas. 🙂

So! What did y’all get? 😀

Oh my

4 Replies

The boxes from Noah’s parents have finished arriving. I’m somewhat shocked by the generosity. I mean, my family buys a lot of stuff but it’s mostly crap. There was a really really nice doll unwrapped on the top so that when we opened the box Shanna’s face lit up like a candle. It’s rather impressive.

And then there are all her Christmas presents.

Wow. We have a very full Christmas tree and I haven’t wrapped anything yet. heh I think Shanna is going to make out like a bandit. Maybe it’s a good thing I can’t afford to get her the awesome kitchen on kids.woot.com right now because she’s already going to be pretty spoiled. Wow.

Wow. 🙂

(And the doll has a handmade jacket that matches the awesome outfit Noah’s mom made last Christmas!! How awesome is that! And a blanket out of the same super cute material! It’s very thrilling. Shanna hasn’t set the doll down yet.)

I might have to poke Noah extra to get him to call and say thank you.

Of course I am already thinking about Christmas.

10 Replies

On MDC there is a thread about trying to limit Christmas so that it doesn’t become a gimmee spree. One woman posted something she got from a book:

The Four Things Children Need At Christmas

1. A relaxed and loving time with family.
2. Realistic expectations about gifts.
3. An evenly paced holiday season.
4. Reliable family traditions.

Combine this with the other maxim about presents posted in the thread:

Something you want.
Something you need.
Something to wear.
Something to read.

It’s making me stop and think about Christmas again. Last year I burned myself out with cookies. I shouldn’t do that again. I’m also thinking that due to financial schtuff this year I really should tell people that we aren’t buying presents. That’s going to be hard emotionally for me and I think for Noah. Awkward.

Question and Purging

3 Replies

As for the question I asked yesterday–I didn’t ask because Noah and I are having trouble negotiating. We are both very happy with how we work things out. The only friction at all is because I have an insane work ethic and I would cheerfully have both of us work 24/7. He does all that I reasonably expect from him and more. 🙂 And I checked this morning–he thinks I do plenty. I asked because this is a frequent theme on some of the boards I read and I was sort of curious how people I actually know feel about it.

I’m starting to feel the urge to get rid of a bunch of stuff. This may or may not have anything to do with the fact that I am moving everything out of the garage and trying to figure out how to fit it all in the shed. 🙂 Part of it is honestly that now that I am done with the comp exam I would kind of like to get rid of the books I had to read but I never actually liked. Why am I storing all of those? Am I trying to brag about how well read I am? Yeah… I think I’m kind of done with that. I don’t need them anymore so they are going to go away. (Before you say anything Rebecca, trying to sell them online would add a lot of hassle to my life that would not be proportional to the time I would have to spend on the project.)

And in looking at how much kid stuff we have I reached the conclusion that I really really don’t want any presents for Shanna for her birthday. She’s turning one. She won’t feel slighted and we have way too much stuff for her already. I should probably send email to the family. If people really feel like they just have to spend money on her I will ask them to give money towards her college fund. 🙂

An excess of riches

4 Replies

Or at least, too much stuff. About nine years ago I bought some wrapping paper from my nephew as he was trying to win a prize in a fundraiser. I’m uhm, still using it. From the looks of the rolls, I may have another four or five years. I’m getting somewhat sick of it and would rather not have more than a decade of the same wrapping paper. So I would love it if some folks brought their presents over here and we can wrap your presents. Hell, I’ll do most of the work if you play with Shanna. 🙂

So c’mon… you know you want to get out of wrapping presents…

Christmas List start

2 Replies

Maybe Noah should bookmark this entry. 🙂

Clothes in size XL. ETSY sucks for linking to. I like gaiaconceptions shop. Her user id seems to be: 5381559

I’m torn between these boots: first one and these: second one I wouldn’t be upset about either. Size 9 US/7 UK

So I can proclaim loyalty: Geek love Size XL

If these motherfuckers ever get it back in stock I want to replace the shirt Spot gave me: Size medium I miss this shirt since it wore out. *sniff*

I am a big fan of Warm Vanilla Sugar and I will happily replenish stock. 🙂 See, I am a vanilla girl!

I would not be mad if I received a couple of good knives. It would be nice to find out what it is like to use knives that are actually sharp. I’ll be careful; I promise!

Go to: and look for hosiery I’ll wear it for you. 🙂

I haven’t read the last Kushiel book yet and I wanna.

A few other books from my wishlist.

I drool all over these socks. Pretty much all of them.

I’m not going to link to a specific place because they are all over the internet, but a textured shirt would be neato.

Movies: Bedknobs & Broomsticks, Davey Crockett, Ella Enchanted, The Gnomemobile, Lt. Robin Crusoe, Mary Poppins, Newsies, Pollyanna, Watcher in the Woods… it goes on.

Jammies in size 4.

Time to go for now. May be back later. 🙂

For Noah’s sake: pressies are weird. What makes me feel the most cheerful is having a present to open on Christmas Eve (jammies!), and two presents Christmas morning. And then there’s the stocking. Good stockings tend to contain a wide array of things: socks/underwear/a small book/movie/food of some kind/neat pens or pencils/small things that could have been presents/gift cards (like $5 for itunes)/bath products/random stuff good for travel/often a small stuffed animal sort of thing/something small that would be neat in the kitchen could be fun… the list of things that go well in a stocking is long. The main point of a stocking is to have a bunch of small things stuffed into it pretty tight so it feels like a never ending treasure trove. It’s a really awesome feeling.

Doing all of this isn’t cheap, but it doesn’t have to be that expensive either. My mom usually spends in the neighborhood of $100-$150/person for their stocking and presents. That will almost certainly be less than you spend, cause you are like that, but you don’t have to be super extravagant either. A gift bag with three or four pairs of really neato socks counts as a present.

I’m in trouble.

4 Replies

I don’t spend a lot of time shopping/browsing online. But I hang out in some places where people do. Today the kick was long skirts. So I’m saving the links here. I would like to just casually mention that I have a birthday coming up. 🙂

http://www.shukronline.com/womens-skirts.html I’m not into the corduroy, but I love the seriously flared ones.
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=10429562
http://www.tznius.com/cgi-bin/product.pl?productid=37&groupid=26
http://www.enwrapturevintage.citymax.com/30inchplussizesilkwrapskirt.html
http://www.justdenimskirts.com/

Holy moly

1 Reply

Noah’s aunt sent us a baby stuff care package. Receiving blankets, clothes, hats, burping cloths, bibs, bath care items, a rather nice diaper bag, an incredibly sweet home made baby book, and a pile of Thank You cards. It is a rather impressive spread of stuff actually.

🙂 I can take a hint. I will never neglect sending her a thank you card again. 🙂 There was no snark or hostility in the present at all so I feel like this was actually a really awesome way for her to express her preferences. 🙂

Maybe I should meet this relative. She lives in Davis.

Pressies

12 Replies

Alright. It’s done. I’ve freakin registered. We are registered at Target and at Crate and Barrel. Target has stuff that is more day-to-day useful and C&B has the perty stuff I would really like to have, but will probably never buy for myself because I am too practical.

I would like to say at this exact moment that I am not expecting anyone to buy us anything. I registered because people have been pressuring me to do so. I have a strong dislike of the societal rules that dictate that we should expect gifts just because we were foolish enough to get married. The entire gift giving culture is one I have a hard time with. I love to give presents; it makes me happy to see people enjoy the things I give them. However, when I give someone a present it is 99.99% of the time with no expectation of reciprication or of particular acknowledgment. (I expect Noah to give me Christmas present–but he and I are clear on that so I’m ok with that exception to the normal rule.) I believe that Thank You notes are neat things that are fun to give/get sometimes but should in no way be mandatory. I was not brought up in a family where such things were standard and I have been shocked as an adult by the number of people who have told me that I am rude for not sending them. ?! Wait–aren’t *you* the rude one for rebuking me for the behavior based on my culture?!

So I will say this: I made gift registries because I know that giving presents feels good. However, keep in mind that your culture around gift exchange and my culture around gift exchange may be very different. If it is important to you to get a thank you card, tell me and I will make an effort in that direction for you because I make efforts to accomodate/appreciate my friends as they most appreciate. DO NOT EXPECT ONE AS A MATTER OF COURSE. That custom is not part of my life. If you will feel like I am ungrateful/unappreciative if I do not respond in a certain way, just don’t give me a fucking present because I don’t need more guilt in my life.

(Oh: event date is July 21, 2007. If you don’t know the last name ask me.)